In March 2011, at 30 years old, I was diagnosed with stage four inoperable adenocarcinoma cancer. The cancer was located at my gastric/esophageal junction which had metastasized to my peritoneal cavity and my lymph system. In terms of western medicine the illness was incurable.
I went home devastated with what had just happened. I felt completely numb and lost with nowhere to turn. My emotions were overwhelming. I could not contain my tears. My whole life was flashing through my mind like a slideshow. It was the most dreadful feeling I had ever experienced.
The tumour at my g/e junction had grown so big that it was blocking the passage of solid food to my stomach. I did not have much time to decide which approach I was going to take.
My brother and I were talking. He told me that there were two roads that I could take. Then he asked me what I was going to do? I took that evening to really think about my life. I thought about my mortality and the fact that I might die. I thought about leaving behind all the people in my life whom I loved so dearly.
I made a powerful, conscious choice. I knew that this wasn’t going to come easy. It was going to be a hard and painful journey. My single thought was that I was going to heal myself. The intention was set. I decided that this was my time and I was going to go for it.
I went back to the cancer hospital in Toronto with my positive mindset and began the treatment they offered me–an 18 week chemotherapy treatment plan. The drugs that I was taking were Cisplatin, Epirubicin and 5fu. The 5fu was in a smaller bottle that I wore in a hip sack. The drug ran up through a PICC line that was put in my arm to connect to one of my main veins near my heart. This drug was constantly flowing through a small drip 24 hours a day. At best, this treatment would only prolong my life. The oncologist made it clear that what they were offering me would only have a 40% chance of having any affect and they gave me a 0% chance of ever being cancer free.
My family was my rock . My sister is a nurse and she took 5 months off from her job to be with me every step of the way. My family became my research team. I was open to trying anything that would assist me on my path. Since I didn’t have any options, we created them.
I made instant lifestyle changes. I took myself off refined sugar and dairy products. My food intake was all plant-based. Everything I ate was organic. I began to juice vegetables to make drinks up to six times a day. All home products that I used, such as deodorant and soap, were organic. I learned the importance of keeping my body alkaline. I purchased an alkaline water machine to help with my PH level. I would lie on the floor for hours and put castor oil on the tumour areas of my body. I used a heating pad to warm the area. I began working with a wonderful nutritionist and naturopathic doctor, who implemented muscle testing and provided guidance as to what vitamins, herbs and supplements to take while keeping my immune system strong and my body balanced. I had all of these things working together to attribute to my highest wellbeing.
I was seeking a connection to a higher power. I am not a religious person and I began to learn that you do not have to be religious to have a relationship with the divine. The power of prayer is so strong and significantly important to my story. I began to pray every day. With my prayers, I began to connect with my higher consciousness, my higher self. By doing so I was surrendering. By surrendering I mean letting go of the collective conscious expectations for me. I began to let go of what I could not control any longer by becoming one with myself. I would say, “Here is my body, I surrender it. I trust that my will and spirit will carry me through all of this fear and adversity. I surrender to the journey of creating a miracle.”
It is surrender that allows the energies to flow and synchronicity to occur. Several people came into my life at the perfect time to assist me with my journey.
I began to work with a man who taught me the teachings of Buddhism and mindfulness. I would meet with him once a week. Together we would meditate and talk about spirituality. He taught me healing mantras and self affirmations. This man helped me understand that, though I could not control the waves, I could learn to surf. It became clear to me that the present moment is all we ever have.I began to realize that there is no right or wrong way when it comes to meditation, spirituality and healing. It’s whatever works best for you. I learned that being able to adapt to any situation and having the freedom to make my own choices was monumental in my healing. When you say I AM, you know how truly powerful you are with no limitations.
My brother is a fireman. One day, he was stationed at a fire hall he wasn’t normally at. He was standing outside by himself thinking about me. A woman was walking up the sidewalk towards him. Her intuition led her to my brother. She asked him if he knew of anyone who needed help with healing? She started to explain that she had a gift as a channel and energy healer. My brother said that he knew a little about healing, and that my mother and sister had just been to Adam the Dreamhealer’s seminar. But they didn’t go for themselves. She said, “I know. They went for your brother. I can help him with his cancer.” My brother was astonished! He had never seen this woman in his life and she knew she was meant to help me. He called me that night and told me about this woman. I contacted her and made arrangements to go to her house the next day.
I remember walking through her front door and feeling a sense of calmness come over me like I had never felt before. She began to explain to me that she was an energy healer and she would be able to help me remove energy blocks within my energy field. I walked over and lay down on her healing table. She had her hands hovering over my body near the centre of my being, right above my solar plexus chakra. She began to describe my energy to me. Her intuition was connecting to my soul instantly. I felt so at peace and ease. She told me that she did not feel doom in my energy. I started to believe in myself even more.
I began working with her every day. I would lie on her table and she would go over my whole body, assisting me with removing energy blocks. At the beginning of our sessions, it felt like someone had put a large magnet over my body. All the negative energy was being pulled out of my body with a strong force of suction. Eventually the magnetic sensation turned into a gentle warmth throughout my body. I could feel the healing taking place within me. She always made it clear that I was healing myself. She explained to me that she was a conduit to energy connected to a higher source. Because of my ability to channel and allow the energy of who I am to flow, I was able to shift my physical, my emotional and my spiritual thought patterns. I was able to heal in every aspect in my life.
Early on in my journey my parents had told me about a healer that they knew of through a family friend. He had a successful career and he did some healing with his free time. My father reached out to him to see if he would see me. He said that he was not doing any healing at this time because he could not help his friend with Lou Gehrig’s disease. His name always appeared in my mind so clearly.
I had one week before my final CT scan. Something was telling me that I needed to somehow get in touch with this healer. My mother contacted him and, after a long heartfelt phone conversation, he agreed to see me.
My mother, sister and I pulled up to his apartment building. We were all so excited and nervous, not knowing what to expect. I remember getting out of the car and walking up towards the building. It felt like everything I had believed in and all the hard work I had put forth had led me to this moment. It truly felt like I was entering into my destiny.
When getting out of the elevator and walking toward his penthouse apartment, a calming came over me. It was very similar to what I experienced with the first healer. We rang the doorbell. The door opened and a huge smile appeared. The first words out of his mouth were, “Are you ready for a miracle?” I almost burst into tears. I was overwhelmed with joy and emotion. I said, “ Yes! I am so ready.”
The four of us went into the living room and talked for a short while. He explained that he was a healer with a special gift. Then he asked if I was ready to begin with the healing session. I went over to the couch in the living room and lay down facing up. He put his hands on the centre of my being. I took a deep breath and could feel the energy beginning to flow. The warmth came over my whole body. I instantly felt such a divine connection and love for this man. I remember repeating in my head “healing, healing, healing.” That eventually switched to my expression of gratitude by repeating “thank you, thank you, thank you.” The session was around 15 minutes in duration. He told me that I was very receptive to the energy and that he was quite optimistic about my prognosis. With there being only three days left until my CT scan, I asked him if I could come back the next two days. He agreed to see me. I came back the following day for another powerful healing session. He was feeling even more confident about me. By the third session he told me that he could not feel any cancer in me and that I should expect a very good result in the coming week.
The two healers I worked with could not detect cancer near me and both would not charge me for their services. They said it was their pleasure to assist me with my healing and help me become well. I love them dearly and will forever be grateful for the way they touched my life.
On August 25, 2011, I was waiting with my sister and father for my test results at the cancer hospital in Toronto. The door opened and the oncologist sat down. He asked if we wanted the good news or the really good news. He explained that there was no evidence of any cancer in my CT scan. I remember my head going down into my hands with such relief and happiness. I was exhausted but I could feel my spirit ignite as I realized that I had just achieved the impossible.
The oncology department could not understand how this had happened. They ordered more tests for me to go through in the coming month. I agreed to do a bone scan, PET scan, a scope and laparoscopy. There was no evidence of cancer in any of the scans. I also did not have any scar tissue after the scope. The surgeon told me that she has never seen this happen in 35 years in her practice . I was told by the medical team that I am in “uncharted territory.”
I had to make very hard decisions and stand strong with what I believed in. The cancer hospital in Toronto was pushing radiation and surgery to remove parts of my stomach and esophagus. They said that, if I did not go through with the surgery, there would be an 80% chance of the cancer coming back within the first year.
I went to Baltimore to a leading cancer hospital for a second opinion. The surgeon told me that the surgery I was being offered in Toronto would be ineffective. He was advocating an experimental surgery called the HIPEC treatment. If I did not go through with this particular surgery, there would be a 95% chance that I would be dead within five years.
I respectfully declined either of these treatment options. It was not easy because of the pressure I was feeling from both hospitals. It ultimately came down to trusting in myself and all the beautiful energies that came into my life to support me. I knew in my heart what had happened. I knew that I had healed myself.
My story is about realizing the power of who you are and what you can do. It’s about making a choice and having the courage to take the first step to achieve whatever it is you aspire to. If you truly believe in yourself, you can accomplish anything!
View photos of my cancer journey